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Issue  135:  Build  Unshakeable  Stress  Resilience

2/27/2025

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I had a great opportunity to speak to the Atlanta chapter of the Princeton Women’s Network recently. We chose as my topic Stress Resilience: The Mind-Body Connection. Writing that presentation got me thinking about habit, ritual, rhythm, and flow as elements of stress resilience.

Come join me in this conversation. I’d love to hear how you use these elements to support your own health and wellbeing!

In Wellness,  Mary Virginia

Over the millennia, our bodies evolved to toggle between protective mechanisms and healing mechanisms. The body-mind is enmeshed in tightly designed programming to seek, support, protect, and defend our health and safety.

Whenever there is a threat, regardless of whether it is a physical, health, emotional, or psychological threat, the body is designed to respond with a singular focus on surviving it. This is called the stress response. And boy! When some car runs a red light and we’re able to maneuver our own vehicle out of the way in a split second, we’re so happy that we have an automatic protection system!

However, when we become chronically stressed, perhaps because of a traumatic experience, a health situation, or maybe because of daily demands, we begin to burn out and our physical and mental health suffer.

The Stress Response
When you think about it, there’s a lot that your body does without your conscious awareness. Among them are physiological processes that are kept running by what’s called the autonomic nervous system. Autonomic means the same thing as automatic. This nervous system automatically assures these major processes keep happening while you don’t even notice:

  • Heartbeat
  • Blood Pressure
  • Tear Production
  • Blinking
  • Sexual Arousal
  • Breathing
  • Digestion
  • Saliva Production
  • Waking Up/Getting Sleepy
  • Urination/Defecation

The autonomic nervous system is made up of three components:
  • Sympathetic Nervous System: stimulating, energizing.
  • Parasympathetic Nervous System: calming, renewing; supportive of digestion, elimination, and procreation.
  • Enteric “Gut” Nervous System: digestion, elimination, immune response, mood.

These nervous systems, together with the cardiac (heart’s) nervous system, collect data from the body and send it up to the brain. The brain interprets the message, forms a story to define it, assigns it meaning, and then sends messages back down into the body about what it should be doing. Mind you, all of this happens in a split second.


Remember, we’re toggling between protection and healing all day every day. The story and meaning assigned by the brain reflect how the body communicates either danger or safety up through the vagus nerve. The brain dictates next steps based on the story and the meaning. That is, does the body still need to be protected? Or are we safe?

We love the sympathetic nervous system! It stimulates cortisol production as morning arrives so that we wake up and have energy to start our day. That stimulation contributes to clear thinking, focus/attention, and generally helps keep us engaged into the afternoon.

The sympathetic nervous system, though, is also thought of as the “fight or flight” nervous system. If any part of the body feels under threat for any reason, the bold, fierce, protective sympathetic response leaps instantly into action to help us think clearly and move fast. Adrenaline is fast to be released and quick to be metabolized. Cortisol, on the other hand, is slow on both counts. It lingers in the system for hours, keeping us on edge and alert to danger.

But you know what the body doesn’t need when it’s in danger?
Distractions like feeling sexy or hungry or having to go to the bathroom, or, you know, being sleepy. The sympathetic nervous system messes with these automatic functions when it’s triggered to protect you.

Here’s the Catch
I’m describing this like the threat is a saber toothed tiger in the woods. But your body doesn’t distinguish between threats, whether physical, emotional/psychological, health/illness, overwhelm, losses, etc. It doesn’t know that you’re “just” having a bad day or that you lost your job or got in an argument with your significant other. It only has one action to save you from danger: the stress response.

That persistent overstimulation sometimes goes by another name: anxiety.

And when you feel so overwhelmed that you become absolutely bound, unable to fight or flee? You freeze (or flop). Another name for this is depression.

How about when our stimulating cortisol levels remain high, but we’re completely worn out from being “on” and not sleeping? We’re wired and tired. Absolutely buzzing and frazzled. This is when we get brain fog, memory issues, irritability, lack of focus, extra distractibility, mood swings, etc. etc.

Our bodies eventually let us know it’s been too much for too long: heart issues, blood sugar and cholesterol dysregulation, weight gain, insomnia, illnesses, nutrient depletions…even cancer.

Resilience
Resilience is built when our bodies spend more time feeling safe, even choosing that feeling of safety as a coping strategy during hard times. In terms of our autonomic nervous systems, this means fostering and nourishing our parasympathetic nervous system response. It doesn’t mean we get rid of stress, but that we have greater capacity in the face of hard things.

The parasympathetic nervous system is also known as the “rest, digest, and procreate” system. I like to think of it as “rest, digest, and renewal.” Quality sleep, good digestion, clear thinking, creativity, thoughtful decision-making, not getting sick (or recovering fast), normal hunger patterns, stable mood, … everything continues to function (even if it’s sometimes toggling into protection).

The American Psychological Association defines resilience this way:

“Resilience is the process and outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences, especially through mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility and adjustment to external and internal demands.” Adapted from the APA Dictionary of Psychology.

Essentially, how we engage with the world, the resources we access, and the skills we cultivate and practice can successfully bolster our resilience.

Intuitive Living
Let’s look at some of the daily resources and skills that can support your resilience.

Food & Meals
If you are interested in exploring a nutrient dense food plan, click here for my Food Freedom newsletter.

Build habits and rituals around food that can support your body to stay stable and feel safe via cellular, biochemical, and metabolic resilience. Things like: routine meals at regular meal times. Combine a protein, fat, and complex carb to create time release energy. Prevent physiological stress by fasting overnight for no more than 12-14 hours. Eat mindfully so that you can be fully present and enhance digestion (good digestion signals safety to the brain). And nourish relationships by sharing meals.

Movement
Movement has so many benefits, including directing the body to create healthier new cells as old ones experience programmed cell death. I can’t capture it all here. Still, with it you will develop biochemical, emotional, psychological, and physical resilience as well as expand mood stability. That said, remember to build in rest days for full recovery! Here are a couple of ways movement builds resilience:

Increases Brain Derived Neurotrophic Factor (BDNF)
The “Miracle Grow” of the brain. Enhances neuroplasticity, cognition, & learning & memory; increases the expression of pro-survival genes; regulates glucose & energy metabolism; increases neuronal communication; low BDNF is found in neurodegenerative diseases.

Mood
Increases blood circulation to take oxygen and nutrients to the brain; increases mood chemicals, including endorphins, serotonin, dopamine, and acetylcholine (which supports memory formation).

Eustress
“Good stress.” Appropriate stress on the body through movement inspires it to build muscle, bone, and energy-producing mitochondria. The outcome of eustress is growth rather than depletion. Incidentally, intellectual eustress does the same for knowledge and the brain.

Sleep
Rituals and routines around evening and bedtime boost physiological resilience, which translates into psychological and emotional resilience. By honoring your circadian rhythm and the processes that happen only during sleep, you will enhance the clearing out of pathway-clogging metabolic waste and the repair, renewal, and rejuvenation of DNA, mitochondria, cells, and tissues.

Cortisol rises with the morning for wakefulness, then diminishes as melatonin begins to rise in the late afternoon/early evening for sleep. These habits allow you to become aware of your own circadian rhythm and take full advantage of it.

Nighttime Rituals and Routines
Do not work after dinner to allow your body to release the day and lean into the relaxing evening and night. Choose calming, attractive activities: reading, tv show, play a game, conversation. Rituals and routines train your body to expect and embrace sleep.

Lighting
Choose as dim a light as is comfortable for the activities you choose in the evening.

Bedtime
No screens of any kind 1 hour before lights out. Read, soft music, light stretching, Keep a bedtime routine. Go to bed at about the same time every night, even on weekends. Again, you are training your body to anticipate letting go of the day and sleeping.

Morning
Upon waking, get outside for 5 minutes or longer to take in morning sunlight. Don’t look straight at the sun! But do look toward it. Morning and late afternoon light trigger the pineal gland to coordinate daytime wakefulness and nighttime sleepiness. Bonus if you enjoy it while taking a walk.

Presence Practices
Presence practices create cascading mental and physical health benefits: mood, immunity, endocrine (hormone) system, nervous systems, and every part of you with which they interact.

They increase heart rate variability (HRV), which helps improve cardiovascular health, blood pressure, blood glucose/diabetes markers, immune function, and more. A high HRV has been found to improve behavioral flexibility and emotional resilience.

If you want to pull all the practices together to create the most profound stress resilience, engage in presence practices. Practice them away from your most stressful situations to train your body to be instantly responsive to them when you need them most. Here are some examples:

Breath Work
Breath work such as 4-5-6 Breathing or Box Breathing. We only breathe deeply when we are safe. Regulated deep breathing not only oxygenates your system, but it engages the stretch receptors of your lungs. The vagus nerve captures that stretch sensation and communicates safety to the brain.

Meditation, Yoga
Try the free Medito app for meditation or Yoga with Adriene. These practices increase HRV and incorporate breath work.

HeartMath
Read about the amazing benefits of HeartMath here.

Social Time
Being with others with whom you feel relaxed, who listen to you, who engage with true interest, and who make you laugh increases HRV, which is why you feel better and calmer after being with them. Build pleasant social relationships into your days and weeks.

Stress Resilience is Yours for the Taking
While stress is going to be a part of our lives, we can build resilience to it for free. We will be most successful when we take a multifaceted approach. Nourish your whole self by establishing patterns and rhythms to your life. Your body will come to anticipate these different forms of nourishment, and you will find yourself sensing intuitively what will bolster and replenish your resilience.

Believe me, after establishing these practices, one day you’ll be in a hard situation, and you’ll intuitively begin to move slowly with intention, breathe deeply, and take a pause to absorb the information. This will allow you to decide how to proceed in a way that serves you best. You’ll be strong and capable. And it will feel great.

“To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”
With apologies to Solomon in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (King James Version) and also to The Byrds, I have crafted a reframed poem to illuminate how to build resilience:
A time to eat, a time to refrain from eating.
A time to move, a time to rest.
A time to connect socially, a time to retreat.
A time to work, a time to be quiet and reflect.
A time to awaken, a time to sleep.
When we listen to the intuitive wisdom of our bodies, we automatically fall into rituals and habits that form a healing rhythm to our days.
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Issue  134:  ADHD  Nutrition  &  Lifestyle:  What to  Include  Next

2/6/2025

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This is our closing issue on our ADHD series. After this you’ll have an arsenal of information to support you in your ADHD journey!

This week I touch on food, supplements, and lifestyle practices. Please know that this is meant to be a glimpse into this world rather than a full illumination. Lifestyle practices alone could take a whole book! Nevertheless, my main goal is to empower you with these tools so your daily life becomes a bit easier and your symptoms feel far less distracting.

If something in this series sparks a question or you’d like to explore how these tools might fit into your life, I’d love to chat. You can always reply to this newsletter, or you can set up a free 1:1 call with me here to learn more about how I work. Or just hop right in and schedule your intake appointment with me here!


In Wellness, Mary Virginia

In this issue we’re diving into interventions that make a measurable difference in ADHD symptoms. I start by touching on medication since that is the most common medical approach. Then I will take you to the three pillars of functional integrative nutrition: food, supplemental and herbal nutrients, and lifestyle practices. These weave together to play a crucial role in managing symptoms and optimizing brain function. While no single approach is a cure-all, combining these strategies with intention can create a strong foundation for focus, clarity, calm and overall wellbeing.

Medication
ADHD meds seem like a great place to start since most people are familiar with them. Prescription medication is outside my scope of practice, but there are some thoughts I like to share to support my clients.

Whether or not to utilize stimulant medications is a discussion to have with a licensed medical professional who understands ADHD. Weigh the pros and cons based on the person and the circumstances. The right medication at the right dose can be an incredible boon for the right candidates. Among other things, using it can allow the person the focus and clarity to establish new habits of being that rewire the brain. Those practices ultimately might allow for meds to be reduced or needed less often.

Please be aware that stimulant medications can suppress appetite, but that doesn’t make eating and food any less important. If you are struggling with food choice overwhelm, prepping and cooking, eating enough or often enough … please reach out to a qualified CNS who can support you to build a realistic and sustainable food plan that can comfortably nourish you!

Foods
As you’ve seen from me time and time again, a food plan must be personalized. That said, there are foods that are common to most ADHD recommendations. Here you go:

Eat Regular Meals
It’s easy to forget to eat when you have ADHD! Set a timer so that you don’t go longer than 3 or so hours between eating. That includes snacking! Not only do your cells need nutrients, your brain needs glucose to function. Add on that it’s a great, planned break from potentially energy-depleting lack of focus or hyperfocus!

When you go without food for too long or you use up your energy, your brain and body will begin to bug you for easy, quick fuel. That’s when the cravings for simple sugars pop up - your brain is jonesing for glucose. And surprise! Processed foods and sugary treats really do work to trigger the reward/focus mechanisms and you feel better - but only for a short time before you crash. Regular meals set you up for both feeding the brain and avoiding the crash that comes with easy sugary treats.

Keep It Simple
The ADHD brain can become easily overwhelmed. Lots of energy is spent processing information, managing emotions, and trying to keep details organized. Sidestep food overwhelm by choosing easy meals you enjoy and that soothe your senses. For example, snacks might include cheese sticks and crackers, apple and peanut butter, hard boiled eggs with a salt sprinkle, or a creamy, customizable smoothie. Main meals can be built around easily microwaved or steamed frozen vegetables and proteins, or prepared foods that can be paired with fresh vegetables, fruit, and proteins. Put foods that nourish your body up front on shelves and in the doors of the fridge so you see (and choose) them first.

Include a Protein and a Carb Every Time You Eat
You see those snacks above? They all include protein. Protein covers several bases. First, it provides the building blocks for good mood and good focus neurochemicals. Second, it also offers up the building blocks for every enzyme, tissue, and biochemical process, which helps keep your body from feeling stressed and depleted. Third, because it takes longer to digest fully, it slows down the absorption of the sugars from carbs so you have a steady drip of  time-release energy. Proteins can be meats, poultry, fish/shellfish, eggs, beans/legumes (pair with a grain to make a complete protein), and nuts and seeds & their butters.

As mentioned, brains strongly prefer glucose as their energy source, and glucose comes from carbs. So eat your carbs so your brain can relax and do its thing. Whole grains (including popcorn!), starchy and non-starchy veg, fruit, and beans/legumes all contain carbs (and, incidentally, fiber!).

Brain Supportive DHA and EPA
Wild caught fatty fish (e.g. salmon, mackerel, sardines), grass fed beef, pastured poultry, nuts, seeds, extra virgin olive oil, avocados and avocado oil are some choices rich in brain supportive fatty acids.

Fats are needed to build the coating for your neurons, called the myelin sheath. Myelination makes brain processes flow more smoothly and faster, enhancing cognition, focus, and memory. These all include omega-3 fatty acids, too, which cool inflammation in both brain and body. (Neuroinflammation worsens ADHD symptoms).

Eat Fiber!
Lots to love about fiber! It feeds the “good” bacteria in your gut that make short chain fatty acids (SFA). SFA’s communicate to your nervous system to make more happy mood & focus chemicals. They also nourish and heal the gut lining and support your immune system. Before that, fiber traps and removes toxins that can stimulate brain fog while making your stool comfortable and easy to pass. Whole grains, whole vegetables (esp. cruciferous veg like broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage), whole fruit, beans/legumes, nuts, seeds.

Green Tea
Not only is it yummy and comes in a variety of flavors (who doesn’t love variety?), green tea contains both caffeine and L-theanine, which when taken together can improve symptoms of ADHD.

Dark Chocolate, Cocoa, Cacao
I’ll bet you didn’t see this one coming! Rich in magnesium, these forms of chocolate also carry flavonoids that improve blood flow to the brain. Fresh supplies of oxygen and nutrient rich blood improved brain processes like cognition and focus.

What to Avoid
Synthetic food dyes have been implicated in ADHD symptoms. You can read more about it in this article from Berkeley Public Health and this one in ADDitude magazine.

Additionally, many people feel better without gluten, dairy, and/or sometimes soy. Mostly, it’s good to observe how your body feels with certain foods and shape your choices to those that make you feel good. As your nutritionist, I recommend that you not remove foods unless necessary. It’s worth a trial removal/reintro to understand how your individual body responds.

Overall you’re looking to create an environment inside your body that makes you feel calm and nourished. That means reducing inflammation (eat the rainbow of vegetables!), supporting it with nutritional building blocks, and providing regular energy.

Nutritional and Herbal Supplements
Lots of families who live with ADHD have tried myriad supplements. However, there are still more folks who live with ADHD who are not aware that improving nutritional status and supporting biochemical pathways with supplemental nutrients and herbs can really change the landscape of their experience. It’s important, though, not to be haphazard about it.

Key to the successful use of supplements is that the choice and doses of nutritional supplements are always tailored to your specific signs, symptoms, lab values, and genetic makeup. They are also influenced by your current food habits and preferences, which determine whether you can achieve the nutritional goals without a supplement (certainly preferable than another supplement to swallow!).

There are several individual and combo products that improve focus/attention, calm overstimulation, and support cognition and memory. Again, it depends on your unique situation. Some of what I might recommend includes:
  • Zinc, Magnesium, Vitamin B6, and/or Vitamin D
  • Other specific nutrients depending on the assessment
  • Pycnogenol
  • OPC’s
  • Tyrosine and tryptophan (precursors of dopamine and serotonin)
  • Green tea extract
  • Essential fatty acids
  • Specific probiotics
  • Calming herbs: e.g. ashwagandha, Holy basil, Lemon balm
  • Nutritional lithium (microdosing from 1mg to 20mg)
  • BDNF Essentials by Researched Nutritionals
  • And others

Be aware, also, that certain supplements can interact poorly with medication. Please work with a qualified nutrition professional before pursuing supplementation.

Lifestyle Practices
Perhaps most surprising to my clients, lifestyle practices quite literally affect your biochemical and genetic expression. How you live your life can actually change your metabolism, how you digest and absorb nutrients from food, and - attention please! - rewire your brain.

Each one of these and many more could have its own newsletter, and in fact I have covered some of them already (look for them here), but I will just list them for now. Please respond to this email if you’d like to talk about any of them!
  • Coaching! You can learn about and apply structures and behaviors that suit your way of being in the world and help you to function effectively in work and life. Check out Impact Parents and/or a Sanity Session, which offer the gold standard for this work.
  • Stimulate the vagus nerve and engage the parasympathetic nervous system, both of which rewire the brain to turn on executive function. Effectively enhance clarity, concentration, cognition, and focus, reduce distraction, calm overstimulation, improve mood, refine decision making, and more benefits - all without drugs.
    • Vagus nerve stimulation practices.
    • Meditation. Try the free Medito app or look at the Mindful website, purchase the Calm app or Headspace.
    • HeartMath. Loads of research on the outcomes of HeartMath specifically for ADHD and neurodiversity.
    • Breath work. There are so, so many to be found on YouTube.
  • Sleep quality and quantity: critical for clearing out metabolic detritus that clogs up the brain.
  • Time in nature - even a walk through your neighborhood.
  • Movement/exercise: increases brain derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), the “Miracle Grow” of the brain.
  • Chiropractic work.
  • Therapeutic massage.
  • Therapies: cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT); somatic experiencing; EMDR, many others.
  • Various practices that enhance focus and motivation (per the Huberman Lab podcast), such as cold exposure, specific forms of meditation, binaural beats, and visual gaze training. I have used these myself, and they are indeed effective as advertised.
    • I’d be intrigued to know if you try binaural beats for focus and attention. I have found they really work to reduce anxiety or calm the mind for sleep. You can find loads of options on Spotify. Just search “binaural beats” and your goal, such as “focus” or “anxiety.”


And That's a Wrap on ADHD
It has truly been a pleasure to share this three-part series with you - breaking down the complexities of ADHD, digging into how to explore your unique processes, and sharing practical strategies to help you find your own path to feeling balanced.

If something in this series resonated with you, shaped a new perspective, or left you with lingering questions, I’d love to hear from you! Reply below with your thoughts, experiences, or anything you’d like me to cover in the future, or email me at [email protected]. Your feedback helps shape what comes next, and I always enjoy learning from your insights.

Thank you for being part of this conversation! Stay tuned for more Inner Workings' health and wellness deep dives!

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    Author

    I am Mary Virginia Coffman (I go by “Mary Virginia”), a clinical nutritionist who focuses on mental health, digestive health, metabolic health, and nervous system regulation. My unique combination of clinical interventions, education, and coaching will help you feel well in body, mind, and spirit. 

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